What I Desire

There are many things that someone can desire in life; money, lovers, fame. All valid things to want but I am a woman of simple pleasures. What I desire the most is a family, not the traditional husband, wife 2.5 kids version, no a family of my choosing. A group of people that I love and care for and who love and care for me.

I can’t imagine that I will end up with a traditional family setup, it just isn’t what I want. I have had a taste of what I desire and it only made me want it more. I want to have the sort of home where you walk in and it just feels cosy and warm. And to be able to share it with 2 or 3 Significant Others (SO’s) and possibly their SO’s too, a big happy family who share each others lives. I know that it wouldn’t always be easy and that these things take work, commitment and communication but I think that to get what I want then these are good things to have to work on. Plus you can’t know that you are contented and happy unless you have had to work for it.

I want to come home from work to our home, maybe the house is empty, maybe it’s not. To be able to go and get changed out of my work wear and pop into the kitchen to start preparing the meal for the evening. Chatting to my SO’s while I do so, from anything as mundane as how work was to our plans for the next Fet event we are attending. All the while the kettle has been boiling away so that when each person gets home there is a cup of tea/coffee available when they walk through the door to go with the welcome home kiss and cuddle.

To be able to mooch together in the living room while the food is cooking, listening to music or watching something while chatting still, just relaxing or going about our individual pastimes. Then to be able to serve up dinner and either all sit in the dining room and eat together or have a relaxed evening and eat off our knees in the living room with a good movie on to watch and then snuggle up afterwards to finish watching.

I know that this would be an idealised evening, life does tend to get in the way of these things, we all have families and friends to see, socialising to do, housework, homework and in the case of World of Warcraft addicts such as myself there is gaming to be done... But this is what a family does.

Then as the evening drifts on and we are all ready for bed we would all start getting ready for bed and then either go to our individual rooms or go and make a lovely warm and comfy human pile in the main bedroom. We could just sleep or we could have lots of naughty fun together but both are good in their own way.

It could even be that someone sleeps in their own room because they are too tired, ill, grumpy, needing their own space. Or it could be that I get in from being out with friends etc and I can crawl into bed with them and cuddle up to them, or have them come in from the same and crawl into bed with me so I can cuddle up to them.

I want to be able to go out as a family, to go shopping for ‘stuff’, to go on holiday, to go to Fet events and have fun together at them. To be able to share all the experiences with my SO’s and build on them over time. And all the time we are out in the vanilla world I want to know that under the ‘normal’ exterior we project (maybe not to well cos shocking the ‘nilla’s is just too much fun) that I am wearing the marks/symbols showing that I belong to them totally. To have a collar or special jewellery on that has been picked out by them for me to wear to show my submission to them, and to wear the marks that they have inflicted on my body while showing their dominance of me, be it for a reason or because we were having fun playing and the bruises are just there for me to stroke, admire and poke as a reminder of that.

Most of all I want to feel loved and cherised for being the strong, mushy, girlie, wyrd person that I am and to be accepted without question. To know that even if my choices are questioned to start with that when a course of action has been decided on that my SO’s will back me up 100%. And if it crashes and burns that they will be there for me to lean on and they will help me get back on my feet.

Does that all sound like too much for a girl to hope to have, am I just day dreaming. Oh well if I am at least it is a wonderful day dream......